Six Fun Things Clients Have Said During Session!

1 “If only Dominique Strauss-Kahn had known about this place, maybe he wouldn’t be in this mess.” - an aged worker for the NYC mayor’s office.

2. “Mmm…how old are you? 22? Yeah, I got a nanny like you back at home. She lives with us. She’s Dutch or something, god, it’s hard not to fuck her. Sometimes I take her panties, yknow, just once or twice…” - Businessman visiting from Connecticut

3. “Capitalism is natural! People are just naturally greedy [Later in conversation] You know what I realized? Everywhere white people took over, everywhere they went and colonized, they fucked up. Why’d you guys do that?”

Me: “You realize capitalism is a white import, right?” - Young black hedgefund manager doing lines of coke in his 7.2 million dollar Tribeca apartment. He gave me cashmere socks. He also told me that “pubic hair and small tits are the last great art of the 21st century,” a thought I appreciated.

4. “Would you come over and dominate my wife? Yeah, we could tie her up to the bed and fuck her together.” - Middle-aged married guy.

5. “You’re gonna go to Egypt? Oh, you don’t want to go there. They treat women like dogs there!” - Queens born and bred construction company owner who repeatedly pushed for a blowjob after being told no.

6. “I think women are less sexually free. They need emotion in order to enjoy sex [pause, thinks about situation]…unless they’re getting paid for it.” - Some old dude.